Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
