she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
