toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
