Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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