Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
