K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
