At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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