his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
