tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
