It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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