You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
