found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
