I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
