He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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