Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Randomize