I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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