In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
