The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Randomize
