K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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