Where is the hickey?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
