even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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