Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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