laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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