garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
