You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
