theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
MIDGETS
????
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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