I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
