is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
