Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
