she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
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