I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
