Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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