I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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