worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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