I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
