i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
