She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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