i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
