So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
