Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
im holly from the hills drunk
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
