she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
