how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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