I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
