you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
