In the future we'll all be gay
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
