No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
