dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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