sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
