Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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