Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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